Aren’t people great?

Today I had breakfast with a lovely lady called Tanya. A friend of mine referred her to me, as she had adopted a little girl 7 years ago and is very involved with all things adoption, so far as even being a counsellor to Birth Moms, so obviously a great person to know in our current situation! She was so very positive about life and motherhood in general and I learn’t loads from her in the hour and a half I spent in her company.

It made me think about the amount of amazing people you come into contact with through this journey, that you probably never would’ve met on the “normal” path to parenthood. Whether they are “friends in the computer” like forum buddies or blog buddies, or just people who are going through the same thing or have been through it a number of years ago. They are all very willing to help anyone going through what they went through, in any way they can, even of it is just to say a little prayer for them from the opposite of the world and share a few words of comfort, just like Delana did ( to me, as a comment on one of my posts. I hope that each and every one of you wonderful and giving Women, know just how much you touch the hearts of the people that you take time out of your lives to pray for, or spur on with motivating words….you’re all great beyond belief, THANK YOU on behalf of us all!

It definitely takes a special type of Woman to take this journey on and I for one am proud to be just “that” type of Woman and look forward to sharing my journey and giving hope and comfort to others like me, as I continue on my journey and also once my prayers have been answered! 🙂


How dare you judge me?!

The main thing that has annoyed me again and again during our journey is the judgemental looks we get when asked the question: “do you want a white or black baby?” And we answer with: “white”.

One even went so far as to say: “but you know black babies give as much love as white ones”?? I really had to bite my tongue…”no REALLY?? Do they?!” DUHHHHH!

Unless you have walked a mile in our shoes, do NOT think that you know where we’re coming from!! We haven’t ruled out adopting a black child, BUT, we feel that there is enough to learn about becoming someone’s Mom and Dad, without having to do it and bring in a culture that we know nothing about, at least with our first child.
Got it? Good, cos if I have to justify myself to one more person, so help me….!!

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We’re not alone!!!

It’s bizarre that you can feel so alone in this process (adoption), like you’re the only couple in the world going through it. Despite all the forums and other blogs on the subject, it takes seeing and speaking to couples going through the same thing, to realise that we are not alone…

Cut to today and we’re queuing at the Police Station to get finger printed for our Police Clearance (last t to cross and i to dot, eeeeeek!) and there is a couple in front of us, around our age. I didn’t pay any attention to them, until I see the paperwork in their hand (I’m a nosy cow!) and on top is the name of a well known adoption agency!! What a coincidence and a lovely reminder that there are others in the same situation as us and that we’re NOT ALONE!!

What a strange and wonderful world we live in 🙂

The cost of Adoption…

Now, before I start, I KNOW you cannot put a price on having a baby and I am not doing that, I’m just having a bit of a whinge about the bills that are coming in thick and fast!!

Luckily, it’s been averaging out at a bill or so a month, enabling us to keep afloat but, now we’re nearing the end of the road (so to speak), it seems the (bill) floodgates have opened! By the time we are done, we would’ve paid MORE than any IVF procedure, but with the added bonus of being 90% certain we’ll have a family this way, rather than the 20% chance of having one via IVF. So, money well spent, FOR SURE, but the belts will have to be a bit tighter this end till January at least and the pressie’s under the Christmas tree will be few and far between (with our eyes on the greater prize tho, I’m sure we’ll be just fine!!).


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I can’t wait to be a Mom!!

As we’ve been married since Oct 05 (just celebrated our 6th wedding anniv in style!), I have heard the “when are you guys gonna have kids?” question since around Nov 05!!

Back then however, it didn’t bother me cos we had our lives stretching out before us and, in all honesty, I wasn’t ready anyway!!

Since our IF was diagnosed tho, the question has bugged me more each and every time and my replies vary slightly, but the fake smile stays the same!

However (and this is one big HOWEVER!), if I am honest to myself, I wasn’t actually ready to be a Mom till about a year ago…

Now tho, I am raring to go and just cannot wait to hold our baby in my arms, come on Birth Mom’s… choose us!!! :):)

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Nearly on the list…..eeeeek!!

Ok, so Monday brought long the long awaited home visit!! What that basically means is that our Social Worker (SW) visited the home that we will (positive thinking) share with our baby.

The visit went very well and even the doggies behaved, our SW LOVED our house and all went exactly to plan (phew)! Now, all we have between us and being on the list for our baby, is the results of the psych test. We are BEYOND excited that, finally, we are nearly there.

Don’t get me wrong tho, we are aware that the list for a white baby is as long as my arm and then some but I just have this strange feeling that we won’t be waiting too long (from my lips…). We are currently following our SW’s advice and spreading the word far and wide by form of an email to friends and family and asking them in turn to forward on…

Perhaps if anyone reading this now knows of a pregnant girl/woman in South Africa, who doesn’t know what her options are, leave a comment please….our SW advises them on ALL their options and not just adoption! Wouldn’t it be great if we found our baby through the power of social media, what a modern concept that would be!!

Thank you in anticipation for all your positive thoughts and vibes, will keep you posted!!


4 months, what 4 months?!

Firstly a quick explanation for the 4 month absence…. I keep meaning to log on and give a proper full on background to this blog and where my feelings stem from, but I keep putting it off, as I do not really want to dwell on the past, but rather I want to (can you guess it?) yup, CONCENTRATE ON THE FUTURE!!

What this means is that you guys aren’t really going to know where I am coming from, instead you are joining me on this journey in the here and now!! So, buckle up…it’s gonna be a hell of a ride 😉