And, by that heading, I don’t mean words, I mean that look that we have ALL experienced, when you dare offer a mother some advice, or agree with something they have said… when they look at you that fraction of a second too long, before slowly nodding/shaking their heads (with their eyes cast down) at what you said and the look says it loud and clear: YOU DON’T HAVE KIDS…WHAT DO YOU KNOW?? (and different variations of same).
This is my answer to anyone reading this, who has ever given someone said look: We have been watching parents closely for the entire time we have been ttc (in our case, 6 years), we have seen the mistakes they make, we have made mental notes of what we feel they have done right, but believe you me, before you had your children, you did not absorb nearly as much kiddy raising info as we have and so, if there ever was someone’s advice to take, you should maybe consider taking ours!!!
Well, this month we have reached yet another TTC milestone…. 6 years since I joyously threw away my last birth control pill packet and, what do we have to show for it?? Absolutely nothing, other than no money, grey hairs and tear stained pillows 😦 😦 😦
We were away for the weekend with friends a couple of weeks ago and they all had their kids with them… the same ages that ours would have been, if we had been “normal” and watching them just broke my heart.
I never wanted to be an “older” Mom, I didn’t want my kids to only have memories of me with wrinkles and the said grey hairs, but I guess it looks like I now have no choice.
So, due to this “milestone” and, after being on the Adoption list for 4 months, we have decided to embark on our 3rd and final ICSI and have consulted a new Fertility Specialist, Dr Volschenk at Vitalab. When we set out on our first cycle, many moons ago in 2007, we decided that we would do 3 and only 3….we’ve read too many stories of couples spending tens of thousands of dollars/pounds and hundreds of thousands of rands on treatments and we just cannot do it….emotionally OR financially.
Wish us luck and keep us in your prayers!!