So, after Monday’s beta not doubling debacle, when yesterday dawned, I decided to be positive and NOT to go for another Beta. When my FS came back to me, he discouraged doing more bloods, but instead he said to bring my scan forward from 7 to 6 weeks…which ends up being 5 weeks and 4 days, as we are going away next week, which mean’s that it is on Friday. So it’s not very long to wait until we know once and for all if the pregnancy is viable. Hence the positivity, if I am going to be proven pregnant or otherwise on Friday, then until Friday, I am damned if I’m not going to enjoy every moment of being pregnant, after all… TODAY I AM PREGNANT…even the clear blue digital this morning said so!!
So, my dear friend from fertilicare (a forum that has kept me sane these past few weeks!)… who is a mere 3 days further along than me and who has been such a positive soul during her treatment, keeping a smile on all our faces… kept me busy yesterday and off good ol Dr Google. She had also made the decision to start to enjoy her pregnancy, as she had experienced some spotting but had seen her sac on a scan and her bloods on Monday were over 3000, so she was happy too and yesterday we revelled in our pregnancies. Then, this morning, she miscarried.
I am so sad for her and her husband, she is truly the most special of people, if anyone deserves a baby to love, it’s her…they have been trying for 11 years. My soul is crushed after 6, I can only imagine what 11 feels like.
So, as with IVF, it turns out that pregnancy is a complete numbers game…the fact that it looks positive and like it is all going to plan, means nothing…tomorrow could bring a whole other kind of hell. That being said, I am still going to remain positive and enjoy being pregnant…today.