This is a question my mother mentioned to me recently, that she has heard on a regular basis, since A came home.
Wow! Can you believe people are so ignorant?
Now, don’t think that I have forgotten that I had the very real worry, that my parents would not be able to love my child, as much as their biological grandchildren. It was a very real fear of mine. I am happy to report, however, that it was COMPLETELY unfounded. A has found his way into their hearts, as if he was born to me, rather than born to be with me.
However, I guess I should have expected comments like that from the general public, as adopted children seem to be defined by that label, for their entire lives.
Having a drink at a work function the other week, a guy cane up to me and blurted out “my wife is adopted”. I am not sure what he expected me to say…maybe, “great!’or “lucky her” or “thanks for sharing”, all I managed, however, was “Oh”!! I am pretty sure that his wife, who I have never met, would not be too chuffed to be talked about in that way…she is a wife and a mother and yet, all she is defined as, is an adoptee!
You also often see it against peoples names when they are in the news. Steve Jobs, for example, when he died and his bio was being floated around cyber space, was described as adopted. I mean, he achieved so much in his life and yet, there it was…his label, ADOPTED!
I really hope that, during his lifetime, A will escape that label, but, I feel that I may be hoping for too much. Even so, we will ensure that he rises above his “label” and becomes all he can be, outside of it and in spite of it.